The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize