dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
