I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
