Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
