You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
