you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
