I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
