I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
