How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
