He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
