Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
