Only a mothe r could love this liver
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
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