Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
