Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
