he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
please don't ironically join a cult
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