whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
