When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
