There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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