So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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