I wish life had little blips of pornography
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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