Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
