This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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