then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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