To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize