So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
