i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Do vagina's smell?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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