i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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