That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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