i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
