4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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