oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
