i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
