They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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