What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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