Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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