My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
