bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize