Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
