Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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