What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
