I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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