I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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