we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
