She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
