You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
