This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
