sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my sisters under your porch take her home
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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