once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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