I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
