how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize